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Grieving the COVID Situation

Fresh Out Of Massage School· Kids and Careers· Running A Massage Therapy Practice

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In this Post: Grieving the COVID situation and how it has affected our world is a reality we are all currently facing!

Mourning a future that will not be.

The whole situation with COVID has filled many of us with a mix of emotions! Some good, some bad, and some scary. And I want to suggest that a big component of what you are currently experiencing is grief. 

Grief for a future put on hold. 

While it may seem silly to think that we are mourning in the same way we would if we had lost a loved one or a client, the truth is, it is very similar. 

We are mourning activities canceled, trips untaken, and financial stability. 

We are saying goodbye to the future we had anticipated – the future we had carefully planned and dreamed, the one just within our reach. 

Have you acknowledged yet that you are grieving a future that might have been?

Have you allowed yourself to feel all the feels? Or have you been powering through it all? 

It is important that we go through all the stages of the mourning process to come out stronger on the other side. Denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance for a future so abruptly ripped from us.  

And while I don’t want to see you stuck for too long in any of these stages, I do want you to experience them! 

I want you to have grace with yourselves as you navigate these uncharted territories!

I want you to realize that even though there is loss on a global scale, and loss “greater” than yours, that you are allowed to be sad over the loss you are experiencing. 

It is real. Your loss is valid. Your loss needs acknowledgment in order for you to move forward! 

So please, take a moment to mourn. Allow yourselves this freedom. You deserve it! 

The Four Tasks of Mourning

One system I find especially useful for grieving was developed by J. William Worden, a professor of psychology at Harvard Medical School. His process “The Four Tasks of Mourning” is an alternative to the “stages of grief” you may have traditionally seen in the past. 

What I like about his model is that it gives the power back to the griever. 

Instead of “stages,” he calls the steps in mourning “tasks.” These tasks allow the griever the control to process their emotions in a more active way.   

As grievers, we are not powerless to the process. 

His Task Are

Task 1 — To Accept the Reality of a Loss

Task 2 — Process Grief and Pain

Task 3 — Adjust to the New World

Task 4 — Bridge a Connection Between What Was and What Will Come

Now grief is not linear, so you may find yourself going back and forth between the “tasks,” and that’s okay! We must be gentle with ourselves as we explore new ways of being, new ways to do business, and letting go of what was. 

Grieving the COVID Situation – Ways to nurture yourself through the process

Journal

Journalling can be so therapeutic! When you sit down and put pen to paper, you know that there is no one judging what you have to say. Your words are for you and you alone. My favorite exercise is to do a stream of consciousness writing. Basically writing everything that comes into your mind. Don’t edit a thing. Set a timer. And just write. You may be amazed the realizations that occur when you allow your writing to flow freely from your soul. 

Pray or Meditate

Prayer and/or meditation can bring profound peace to a worried soul. While you may be angry, scared, or sad about the situation at hand, if you can slow down and connect with source, you may find answers and revelations you never expected.

Surround Yourself with Supportive People

Now obviously during this time of quarantines we cannot or shouldn’t always meet in person. However, there are still ways to connect without leaving your home. There’s Zoom and Google Hangouts, Facetime, email, and good old fashioned phone calls. 

If you don’t feel like you have supportive people in your life, reach out to professionals. There is no shame in talking to a therapist! And there are all kinds of online options for therapy these days. 

My friends and I have started a weekly Zoom meet-up. We spend the first 45 minutes playing a game together online, and the second 45 discussing our specific problems from the week. It is so cathartic to meet weekly with them and talk through the challenges we are all facing. 

Drink lots of Water and Eat Healthy Food

Now more than ever, we have time to cook nutritious foods for ourselves. By eating a diet rich in vitamins and minerals, we are bolstering our immune system, which also aids our emotional recovery. 

Get Plenty of Sleep

This can be challenging as we navigate fear of the unknown, so set yourself up for a more successful sleep experience. Spend 10-15 minutes before bed meditating or practicing deep breathing. Turn off the news, set down the phone, and get to bed a little earlier than usual.

Listen to Music That Feeds Your Soul

Experiencing music can be an incredible restorative experience. Lose yourself in the beats, and you will be dancing yourself out of the mourning process in no time at all!

Now again, be gentle with yourselves as you walk through the mourning process. Because you are grieving, and grief is a process!

Massage

Author Profile

Ali Boehm
- Boulder College of Massage Therapy Graduate
- Nationally Certified through NCBTMB
- Colorado Licensed Massage Therapist
- Certified CranialSacral Level 1 through Upledger
- Certified Herbal Therapist through Nutrition Therapy Institute
- Certified Fujian Massage through Barefoot Masters
- Fort Lewis College - Majored in Art, Minored in Business Administration
- 6 Year Winner of Best Massage Therapist for "Best of The Boat" Competition
- Massage Business Owner Since 2008
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  • Podcast Episode 050: Show Up & Shine on Social Media with Stacey Hagen
  • Negotiating A Massage Lease
  • Insurance Billing For Massage Therapists
  • Podcast Episode 049: Diversifying Your Income with Soul Care Coaching with Christine Boye
  • Podcast Episode 048: Taking Care of Your Mental Health is Cool

the.massage.business.mama

the.massage.business.mama
My son is becoming quite the portrait photographer My son is becoming quite the portrait photographer. Don't you think? 

Today is moving day for my business, and I'm finding myself quite sad! 

I've been in my current location for a little over three years. It was a COVID move that brought me to my current location. For FOREVER I was month to month, not fully committing to the space. 

And here we are 3+ years later, finally moving to a space that feels more like home, more aligned with my goals, more appropriate. 

Yet I'm sad!

I'll miss my neighbors and my current routine. I've helped so many people in this space. I've spent some life here! 

So today, I'm just going to feel the feels:)

#themassagebusinessmama #massagestudent #massagelife #massagetherapist #massagetherapistlife #massagebusinessowner
A few years ago, when I still had therapists worki A few years ago, when I still had therapists working for me, we had an unfortunate occurrence.

A young woman who had recently been sexually assaulted came in to receive massage. She was trying to regroup and recover from her negative touch experience through massage. 

Her therapist insisted that she remove her bra.

Under "normal" circumstances, this wouldn't have been a huge deal. Not appropriate, but not a huge deal. But in this situation, it was catastrophic.

The young woman was extremely sensitive. The recent assault left her jumpy, nervous, and unable to stand up for herself.

She didn't feel comfortable speaking up and spent an hour feeling further violated. 

I was heartbroken a few days later when the situation was brought to my attention! 

Our job as therapists is to make clients feel comfortable. We have a responsibility to tap into our intuitive sense to see when our client's unspoken needs are not being met.

WE ARE NEVER TO TELL SOMEONE THEY MUST TAKE OFF MORE CLOTHING THAN THEY FEEL COMFORTABLE!

Chances are good we are working on people with turbulent touch histories. We need to be sensitive!

We must be vigilant in our observations. Sensitive in our approach. And avoid getting stuck in ruts. Each client has a complexity of emotions and past histories that they bring to the table, and it is our job to be aware of this range of experiences.

Our job is to develop tools that allow us to give fabulous treatments regardless of whether or not a client is fully clothed because healthy touch is an essential healing tool! 

#massagetherapist #massagestudent #themassagebusinessmama #massagetherapyproblems #massageentrepreneur #massagepreneur
How do you know you are a “Massagepreneur?” # How do you know you are a “Massagepreneur?”

#massagepreneur #themassagebusinessmama #massagepodcast #massagetherapist #massagelife #massagelifestyle #massagestudent #massagecoach #massagegoddess #massage
Setting your massage rates is one of the most diff Setting your massage rates is one of the most difficult things to determine in the beginning of your massagepreneur journey.

If you have yet to determine your rates, I know this might feel daunting and that you have undoubtedly spent much time lamenting over it, but now is the time to set your prices once and for all! 

However, before you arbitrarily pick a number out of thin air, I want you to do a little research/homework/reflection. 

Setting rates is a tricky thing.

Charge too little, and you will be in the poor house. Charge too much, and you risk pricing yourself out of the market. 

BUT it is important to note that often people perceive those with lesser prices as less than therapists. Charging a higher price might actually make you more appealing. 

Oh, they charge a lot, they must be good! 

Food for thought.

#massagepreneur #massagetherapist #themassagebusinessmama #massagebusiness #massagerates #massagestudent
Have you ever heard, "No publicity is bad publicit Have you ever heard, "No publicity is bad publicity?" While it isn't entirely true, there is something to this notion!

Lately, I have been encouraging therapists to contact their local publications with press releases to get featured in their local news sources. 

While promoting yourself in this way can be intimidating, it IS your job as a business owner to put yourself out there and ensure you are being seen! 

Let's first talk briefly about what a press release is. A press release is a tool you write to a news outlet to announce something newsworthy that you want them to cover in their publication. The purpose of a press release is to get coverage and get noticed by a target audience.

Some Ideas for Press Releases Include:

🖤Opening Your Business
🖤Adding Unique Modalities
🖤Classes or Events You Are Hosting
🖤Touch Deprivation and Massage Benefits

Steps Involved: 

1) Identify who to address your press release to. 
2) Properly format your release. 
3) Include useful and timely statistics. 
4) Make your hook obvious.
5) Supply high-quality images. 

When you successfully follow these steps, you will be amazed as your name and image gets shared all over town! 

If you choose to reach out to your local news sources through a press release, I would LOVE to hear how it goes for you or has gone for you in the past! Please share!!! 

#massagetherapist #themassagebusinessmama #massagepreneur #massagestudent #massagenews #massagebusiness
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